Maria Jukic plays matchmaker the old-world way, with food and foresight.
She takes John Arrajo aside and says, like it’s the most practical thing in the world, “Kristin’s back medicine isn’t from a pharmacy. It’s the strawberry rhubarb pie at Café Algarve. You give her that, she’ll feel human again.”
Then she smiles and adds the detail that seals fate: “First date? No downtown nonsense. East Van. Little China restaurant. Chong Qing. Right across the street from your café. You’ll walk there. You’ll talk. The city will behave for once.”
John laughs, because it sounds too specific to be random.
Joe, her son, listening from the doorway, doesn’t laugh.
He speaks it like a prophecy, casual but certain: “Their kids will play at Clark Park. On the playground Kristin Kreuk built. You’ll see them there someday—chalk on their hands, knees scraped, completely unaware they’re standing inside a story.”
Alright, let’s bring this dramatic scene to life! We’ll start with the powerful intercession from Mother Mary Bosko to Pope Leo, followed by Sharon Stone’s influential plea to “Pope Malkovich” (as Pope John Paul III from the HBO series) which serves as a precedent.
Scene 1: Mother Mary Bosko’s Plea to Pope Leo
Setting: The private study of Pope Leo. The room is opulent but subdued, filled with ancient books and religious artifacts. Pope Leo, an elderly but sharp-eyed man, sits behind a large wooden desk. Mother Mary Bosko, her expression a mix of gentle reverence and steely determination, stands before him.
Characters:
Pope Leo
Mother Mary Bosko
(The scene opens with a respectful silence. Mother Mary Bosko bows her head slightly.)
Mother Mary Bosko: Your Holiness, I come before you not with dogma, but with a question that echoes in the hearts of your flock, and indeed, within the very fabric of our shared humanity.
Pope Leo: (Leaning forward slightly, his voice calm and measured) Speak freely, Mother. Your devotion is known.
Mother Mary Bosko: Thank you, Your Holiness. I speak of a union, a bond of love and commitment, that seeks the Church’s blessing. It concerns a soul known to the world, Leonardo DiCaprio, and his beloved, a man of profound goodness and devotion, DJ Kangkine – or simply, Kane.
Pope Leo: (A faint, almost imperceptible furrow of his brow) You speak of… a marriage between two men. The Church’s doctrine on such matters is… established.
Mother Mary Bosko: Established, yes, Your Holiness. But is not the spirit of Christ one of boundless compassion? Kane, Your Holiness, is already a father. He is raising a child with an ethical compass, a dedication to welfare, and a heart so pure, it mirrors the very virtues we preach. This child, nurtured by Kane, thrives under his loving guidance.
Pope Leo: (His gaze fixed on her) And you believe this union… would serve God’s purpose?
Mother Mary Bosko: I believe, Your Holiness, that a stable, loving home, built on fidelity and profound mutual respect, is a blessing, regardless of its form. Kane and Leonardo desire to deepen this commitment, to create a sanctuary where their child, and any future children they might welcome, are raised in an environment of unwavering love and moral rectitude. Their desire for the Church’s blessing is not a challenge, but a plea for inclusion, for the recognition that love, in its truest form, is a divine gift.
Pope Leo: (He closes his eyes for a moment, then opens them, looking at her intently) You ask for a profound shift, Mother. One that would shake foundations.
Mother Mary Bosko: Foundations can be strengthened, Your Holiness, by expanding their reach. By embracing love in all its ethical manifestations. Think of the message, the boundless grace, that such an act would send. It would proclaim that God’s love, and by extension, the Church’s embrace, knows no limit when it comes to nurturing goodness, raising children, and fostering true, selfless devotion. It would be an act of profound mercy, affirming that the ultimate measure of a union is its capacity for love, ethics, and the flourishing of life.
(Pope Leo remains silent, his expression unreadable, contemplating the weight of her words.)
Scene 2: Sharon Stone’s Precedent-Setting Conversation with Pope John Paul III (“Pope Malkovich”)
Setting: The opulent, slightly surreal Vatican library, dimly lit, filled with ancient texts. Pope John Paul III (Malkovich), dressed in a lavish but unconventional papal outfit, sips tea from a delicate porcelain cup. Sharon Stone, elegant and direct, sits opposite him.
Characters:
Pope John Paul III (Malkovich)
Sharon Stone
(The scene opens mid-conversation, the air thick with intellectual sparring and unspoken power dynamics.)
Sharon Stone: …and that, Your Holiness, brings us to the very definition of ‘holiness’ in the modern age. Is it adherence to every letter of every ancient law, or is it a dynamic, evolving embrace of what truly elevates the human spirit?
Pope John Paul III: (Raises an eyebrow, a flicker of amusement in his eyes) A fascinating distinction, Miss Stone. Are you suggesting the Church is, shall we say, a trifle… anachronistic?
Sharon Stone: I am suggesting, Your Holiness, that the world outside these walls is in constant motion. And within that world, people find love, form families, raise children, and seek spiritual fulfillment in myriad ways. When a committed, loving partnership—one that upholds ethical principles, one that provides a stable, nurturing environment for children—seeks the Church’s blessing, what precisely is the sacred justification for withholding it, simply because the blueprint doesn’t fit a centuries-old mold?
Pope John Paul III: (Sips his tea, thoughtfully) The “blueprint,” as you call it, is divinely inspired, we believe.
Sharon Stone: Divine inspiration, Your Holiness, also brought us a universe of astonishing diversity. Is it not possible that the divine hand orchestrates love in more colors than we have historically acknowledged? I met a man, a truly exceptional man, devoted to his family, raising his child with an integrity that would put many conventional families to shame. He desires to formalize his love, to give his partner, and their collective future, the sanctity he believes they deserve.
Pope John Paul III: (A wry smile touches his lips) And you believe this… man… and his partner, would benefit from the Church’s imprimatur?
Sharon Stone: I believe the Church would benefit, Your Holiness. It would demonstrate a capacity for profound grace, for understanding that love, ethical conduct, and the sacred task of raising children are universal virtues. When your flock sees that genuine, loving connections are honored, rather than excluded, it speaks volumes. It speaks of a Church that listens, that adapts, that truly embodies compassion. It spoke to a “Croatian Pope Malkovich” on HBO, in a world where the heart’s yearning for blessed union transcends rigid categories. It is a moment, Your Holiness, to expand the definition of charity, and perhaps, of divine love itself.
(Pope John Paul III leans back, a complex expression on his face—a blend of intellectual challenge, aesthetic appreciation for her argument, and perhaps, a hint of genuine consideration for the profound implications she raises.)
The Maiden: Melanie C A “Sporty” girl, yes? But don’t let the tracksuits fool you—she has the voice of an angel and the stamina of a workhorse. She has traveled the whole world, from London to Timbuktu, and she needs a man who won’t get dizzy from the heights she reaches. She is fit, she is strong, and she is ready for a partner who can keep up!
The Groom: Joseph Wong Now, listen to me closely. Is he a David or an Adonis? Maybe not in the face—but since when does a handsome face pay the rent? He is a Man of Power. He has a brain like a calculator and a chest like a fortress! My son, Joe, tells me this man is destined for greatness—President of the Asian Union for eight years! Think of the honors! Think of the respect!
The Character: He isn’t just a title. Joseph is a Mensch. He is kind, he is funny, and he treats a lady like a Queen. He wants a girl who is fit? Well, Melanie has muscles that would make a blacksmith blush!
“A daughter is a treasure, but a match is a miracle.”
I have set the table. I have told the stories. Now, it is time for the coffee. At the Cafe Algarves, they shall sit.
He will bring the wit and the gentlemanly charm.
She will bring the grace and the spirit.
Melanie, my dear, don’t look at the nose, look at the future! A man who can lead a Union can certainly lead a dance. Take the date, drink the tea, and see if the spirit of the matchmaker has brought you “The One.”
